feminine-genius

In God's Time

Thie life of this remarkable woman, Penelope Hughes-Hallett , reveals to us that life is [usually] long, and that if one is determined s/he can acquire one's heart's desire with a little work. She was heading off to school in 1943 when she realised that her widowed mother really needed her to stay at home to help with the younger children.

She was to remember all her life the disappointment with which she unpacked the trunk which had been already waiting in the hall for the start of the new term.

Her life for the next three decades was essentially a private one. As young women, she and her sister Miranda were society beauties, albeit of slender means, attending deb dances in ball gowns improvised by their mother from curtain material. Still hoping for a literary career, Penelope took a job as a secretary at Faber & Faber, where TS Eliot was an editorial director...

There she met a young man, married and had three children. Thirty years later (in her mid-forties), she began to piece together that education that had been cut short, taught at her local college and found her voice as a writer. This obituary has the nicest words for both her work and her own life:

Her prose was elegant, her humour sympathetic. On its publication in 2000, The Immortal Dinner was widely praised for its inventive structure and warm humour, as well as for the breadth of vision it brought to the cultural life of the period [19th century London life].

A delightful conversationalist, full of droll anecdotes and lucid comments, in each capacity she made new friends, and won respect and affection in equal measure. Unfailingly sensitive to others' needs, her wit and sweetness of manner gilded, without blunting, her determination and intelligence.

 How nice is that! Look for her titles -- they seem well worth the effort!

Stop the trafficking

We have the Pope's prayer intentions for the month of May, and the general intention is:

"That the shameful and monstrous commerce in human beings, which sadly involves millions of women and children, may be ended."

Let's keep this at the forefront of our prayers, because as bad as Indonesia and other distant lands are in this regard, there is horrific activity right here in the US. Consider, though, spreading the word about this apostolate:

Human trafficking has become the fastest-growing criminal industry in the United States. An estimated 300,000 slaves live in the U.S, reports MNN. Defeating any theory that sexual slavery is a problem native only to third world countries, the State of Ohio alone is home to over 1,000 U.S.-born child prostitutes. Ohio has become the fastest-growing state in terms of human trafficking and contains the trafficked child capital of the country: Toledo.

To combat these startling figures, InterVarsity Christian Fellowship held its Price of Life campaign last week at Ohio State University.

"The monstrous nature of the human trafficking industry requires that we as Christians put our faith on the line, put our actions where our mouth is, and do all that we can. Fighting this issue requires that we engage it from an academic perspective, a political perspective, a social work perspective, a medical perspective, a legal perspective, and certainly it requires us to pray."

The Price of Life campaign sought to do exactly that--address the issue from all angles. A "Parade of Tears" kicked off the week as thousands of students participated in a symbolic march down a piece of the Underground Railroad. Speakers from organizations like International Justice Mission and the Not For Sale campaign became guests in classrooms. A Town Hall Meeting held discussions with State Representatives and Senators on passing legislation, and interactive proxy stations invited students on campus to explore their thoughts on trafficking and Christ's relationship to justice.

Last minute note

This Saturday, May 1st, I'll be at St. Theresa's Church, Rye Beach, NH for a woman's conference. It runs from 8:00 - 3:30 pm and there may still be room for more (last I heard it was filling up fast). Should be a great group of women -- perhaps you're available to join us!

Bewildering double standard

This excellent article at Front Page cannot be missed for its essential twist on the clergy scandal.

There is much to suggest that media criticism of the Church is fueled less by outrage over pedophilia, and more by another agenda.  There wasn’t much outrage over Roman Polanski’s rape of a 13 year-old girl a number of years ago.  When attempts were made last year to bring Polanski back to the U.S. to serve his sentence, many of the same cultural elites who are now condemning the Church, leapt to his defense.  Likewise, there has never been much media outrage over the apparent crimes of celebrated sex researcher Alfred Kinsey.  The media continued to lionize Kinsey long after it was revealed that he had collaborated with pedophiles in order to gather data.  “What did Kinsey know and when did he know it?” has never been a pressing question for CNN or The New York Times.

There is, of course, a major exemption from media condemnation of child abuse.  It appears that the abuse of children is much more acceptable to the opinion-makers when it is protected by the shield of multiculturalism.  The media has been much less willing to criticize the widespread child abuse that occurs in Islamic cultures, or to note that, in the case of Islam, the abuse is religiously sanctioned.  For example, although one can find plenty of criticism of the Ayatollah Khomeini’s political views, rarely does one see a condemnation of his views on sex.  The one-time spiritual leader of Iran not only endorsed sex with children in his writings, but he also took to himself a 13 year-old bride.

Here we come to the world-historical turning point of which the frenzied assaults on the Catholic Church are only a part.  The drive to undermine the Church’s moral authority, and the threat posed by Islam are linked in an ironic way.  For many centuries the Catholic faith was the main bulwark against the Islamization of Europe.  Now that Christianity is in decline in Europe, Islam is on the move again.  And with the growing presence of Islam has come an increase in child abuse—or what the West considers as child abuse.  The sexual exploitation of children is considered a far less serious offense in Islamic societies, and is often protected by the force of sharia law.  Muhammad, who consummated his marriage with Aisha when she was nine years-old, is considered by all Muslim authorities to have provided a “beautiful pattern of conduct.”  That’s why, whenever a Muslim country tries to ban child marriages (as recently happened in Yemen), you can be sure that the imams will rise up to insist on their right to marry minors.

Considering child marriages, female genital mutilation, honour killings, the second-class status of women, the ongoing fire-bombing of schools for girls in Islamic countries and polygamy itself, it is bewildering why Islam is given a pass and the Catholic Church is targeted as the enemy of women and children. What is really behind the groupthink attacking the Church and the group hug offered to Muslims? It simply doesn't add up.

Nice Line-up

We try to keep the material fresh over at CE's page for women, so setting up a bookmark might be handy for you. Please spread the word to writers (and aspiring writers) and let other women know that there's an amazing archive of articles on a wide range of topics. A whole new look will be rolled out around the end of May (how exciting is that!) and then we'll be off to the races.  

Food or faith?

As you watch this video, consider her dress (which is lovely!) and the fact that she didn't coordinate with the Feminine Genius blog about her wardrobe. Thus we have a clash of colours (at least in my myopic view) that pits the purple against the orange. It is illustrative of the philosophical impasse she discovered:

While "in taste there can be no dispute" (Aquinas) if we replace colours with world-view, we see clearly that conscience stands a good chance of being trampled. If the mainstream mandates that "everyone's right!" then Christianity must be excised from the public discussion -- for truth is vastly different than mere matters of taste.

These traps are being laid in the medical community, social services of all kinds, and public servants everywhere, who will be called to toe the line on diversity and tolerance. So medical procedures, school curricula, end of life issues, family crises and distribution of government dollars are quickly becoming entrenched with a worldview patently incompatible with our faith. The weeding process is well underway, has her course directors show. Now comes our opportunity to choose Christ or accomodate evil. Paycheck optional.

Applauding divorce

Marriage can end in two ways: there are divorces and there are decrees of nullity (saying there was no legitimate union in the first place). Since other religions don't have the wisdom of the Church to remind them of fundamental elements of human dignity, they must use divorce to separate what should never have been united. Like geriatric men and little girls.

Mothers Day approacheth

Instead of the usual flowers, I've found a new gift that may thrill all of you. Soap!  (It supports a lovely family with worthy apostolates as well)

A unique gift of self

Cheryl Dickow has a lovely piece here about the generosity in sharing one's death with loved ones.

So when a person allows him or herself to become that “weak link” in the chain of life, he or she is actually becoming a conduit between heaven and earth. This person is saying, “This is incredibly difficult for me to rely on you, but I will trust that you have my best interests at heart and that you will not think ill of me.”  In that way, the person in need of care is allowing the potential caregiver(s) to become mercy and love to another human being.

This is a must-read, at some point, for we will all face such situations in our family circle. I don't think I've ever quite thought about dying from this angle, and you can see it requires intense humility on everyone's part.

A bundle of excuses

This man describes what he calls his "fall from grace:"

If you had said to me then that in a year's time I would be departing our impressive London home for a bedsit nearby, my marriage in ruins, I would have stared at you in disbelief. And now here I am, aged 44, out on my tod on Sunday February 14 2010, banished from my home, wifeless, making bleary-eyed contact with a dad tending to his two year-old at the next table while his partner bottle-feeds her infant brother. I feel a mixture of sadness, envy, embarrassment and utter remorse. It is all my fault.

My happiness that St Valentine's Day last year camouflaged a problem. I had begun an affair with another woman. It began as innocent flirting in the school playground, which evolved into popping around to her place for morning coffee.

He agrees that he was guilty of lust, but the analysis of what women's success in the workplace is very interesting.

There is a cultural revolution going on here. A generation of women have emerged who are not only brilliant at work but also run their homes in the same utterly efficient way that they run their businesses. The staff (husband/nanny) are given tasks they are expected to perform and their execution is constantly assessed. Men haven't adjusted to this change. They are not used to being monitored in the home, which was once a place where they could do what they wanted. They are in a sort of cultural limbo where they have relinquished one role (being the sole provider) but haven't properly replaced it with anything else. Work defines us. When men were dominant at work and at home, women found themselves having to kowtow to them and their self-esteem was slowly eroded. In many families the boot is now on the other foot.

He almost allows this to be an excuse for his bad behaviour (there is none) but he steps away from that conclusion. It did give a glimpse into a man's mind about shared parental responsibilities, but showed more than anything how little graciousness and good will there was about each little action for others. 

While he admits to his wife's utter humiliation by his affair, he misses completely (or ignores) what it does to his children beyond complicating their child care.

Rearing children is a bit like a round of golf. Lots of irritation and scuffling about in the rough, all the mess, constant disruption and the tantrums. But one drive down the middle – a cherubic face, a funny observation in the dentist's waiting room, a tickling session at bedtime – make it all compelling. It's far deeper and more fulfilling than the brief thrill from illicit passion. I knew that before. Now I really feel it.

He said it wasn't worth it, and perhaps it will stand as a cautionary tale. I imagine he'll be sowing this whirlwind for the rest of his life -- as will the poor children.