Like no locker room I've ever seen

Aaaargh! My beloved hockey may have to stay out of this house an additional year. After a lockout shutting down the season last year, they're trying to recoop their losses ... with woman-flesh.

The commercial, produced by the NHL, opens with a quote from Chinese military philosopher Sun Tzu: "A clever warrior is one who not only wins, but excels at winning with ease."

It then shows a bare-chested hockey player sitting on a wooden bench in a candlelit room, approached by an attractive woman in a flowing dress, displaying plenty of cleavage. The woman touches the man's shoulders, asking him, "Ready?"

The bogus response is thus:

"This ad shows no disrespect for women," Mansur told the Star. "On the contrary, the woman is the spiritual and physical trainer for the 'Warrior' and is his mentor, preparing him for the competition."

What warrior turns to a woman for guidance? Ever? Anywhere? On any battlefield? And a woman with her shirt open, at that? She's the battlefield spoil if he manages kills her family. Even the worst of knights knew a lady's handerchief had to do as inspiration, while his training came from the Lord of the Manor. And spiritual training? That would be the sacraments at the hands of a priest, because of the likelihood of a gruesome death.

This locker room looks like something out of a cheap love shack, where a quick trip to the Candle Outlet tries to compensate for the lack of moral integrity. Has anyone smelled a hockey glove? A used skate? Bengay? None of these are conducive to a candlelit tryst, which is the underlying message.

Sadly, Martha Burk is not the right messenger for this attack on the NHL. She blew it with her ridiculous history with the PGA, but someone needs a smackdown. Ray Bourque, call your office.

Comments

[Teresa]

"...the woman is the spiritual and physical trainer for the 'Warrior' and is his mentor, preparing him for the competition."

Pu-u-ulese! Now that was so thin it made me laugh. It's akin to the proverbial "trying to get to second base lines" some high school boys used to try. My personal favorite response was to tell the young man to keep his hands off or I would walk home from our date... and my ex-Marine father would KILL him.

Go Flyers, by the way.