For once, I share the outrage of Maureen Dowd, who brings to light a horrific case of mysogynistic thuggery in a prestigious a boys' school:
A group of soon-to-be freshmen boys at Landon, an elite private grade school and high school for boys in the wealthy Washington suburb of Montgomery County, Md., was drafting local girls.
One team was called “The Southside Slampigs,” and one boy dubbed his team with crude street slang for drug-addicted prostitutes.
The young woman who was the “top pick” was described by one of the boys in a team profile he put up online as “sweet, outgoing, friendly, willing to get down and dirty and [expletive] party. Coming in at 90 pounds, 5’2 and a bra size 34d.” She would be a special asset to the team, he noted, because her mother “is quite the cougar herself.”
Before they got caught last summer, the boys had planned an “opening day party,” complete with T-shirts, where the mission was to invite the drafted girls and, unbeknownst to them, score points by trying to rack up as many sexual encounters with the young women as possible.
The girls found out, their parents went ballistic, and the matter was subject to some in-house discipline that has been shrouded in confidentiality. All well and good, considering there was nothing good about the endeavor. I was gratified to hear the anger in the statements given by the girls' fathers -- the absence of which has led to many a girl's demise. But then, MoDo's final statement left me entirely unimpressed:
Jean Erstling, Landon’s director of communications, said she was “aware of the incident” but that “student records including disciplinary infractions are confidential.” She said that “Landon has an extensive ethics and character education program which includes as its key tenets respect and honesty. Civility toward women is definitely part of that education program.”
Time for a curriculum overhaul. Young men everywhere must be taught, beyond platitudes, that young women are not prey.
Here's the problem dear readers. Virtue is not taught in a curriculum, and character education cannot be left to the schools. There can only be spotty success at best in such a system left to operate in a wider culture that winks at promiscuity, laughs at fidelity, and scorns integrity.
The very Washington Post, which hosts this column, made George W Bush the subject of ribald humour for his early bedtime, his "boring" social life and his own "character," which wasn't flashy enough. Completely apart from his policies, which are fair game for critique, his person was derided for the faith that guided it and the principles behind his decisions.
Similarly, with the divorce rate escalating, the acceptance of cohabitation and the underlying expectation that "all kids will have sex," what is shocking about setting up a game like structure for an activity? Isn't that what boys do? Many mothers will attest to the fact that bands of boys spend more time establishing rules and procedures for a given pastime than actually pursuing it, and here we simply have it applied to the the most thrilling of contact sports.
In the larger context, we now have a generation introduced to intimacy as an act devoid of meaning, separated from commitment (either to partner or offspring) and ubiquitous in the mass media (run by adults and funded by this wider community). Those who decry porn are tarred as prudes and those who try to set standards of decency are dismissed as myopic and judgemental.
So the boys imbibe the wider culture, watch how the adults around them act and apply their boy genius to the rules of the "game." Why the shock? Our post-Christian culture is in a process of decay and the structures that were once formed by Revelation are now empty constructs peopled by non-believers. The dignity owed to girls as persons in the image of God has been eliminated and cannot be effectively replaced by book learning on secular models. Anything short of a religious revival will be inadequate to slow the decline.
Marriage, modesty, chastity and charity are unhinged from the God Who gave them meaning. Their ghostly remnants have no transcendent meaning -- and our children recognise that. If girls are not raised to know the beauty of their vocation, and boys are not taught to protect and collaborate with them as co-workers in God's vineyard, then all the angry fathers and fierce op-eds are useless to direct them otherwise.
Comments
“People have realized that the complete removal of the feminine element from the Christian message is a shortcoming from an anthropological viewpoint. It is theologically and anthropologically important for woman to be at the center of Christianity."
This is just another of the unintended consequences of the cultural acceptance of contraception and abortion! Men's sexuality has been robbed of its creative essence. It is now viewed as something that imposes a burden on women (when conception happens to occur), something used to control women or something that is purely recreational. Why would men bother?? In taking away their responsibility, we've also robbed them of their significance! In the big picture of humanity, men have been made into nothing more than a nuisance women have to figure out how to control in order to bring about the next generation. Men don't see it as their task to protect the vulnerable because they see themselves as the vulnerable ones. A few well preserved vials of sperm would make men entirely obsolete in the world's ethos today!!
That is astounding Robin, and good for you for standing up. At the heart of that matter, I think, is even worse than a gender mixing message. There is an increased sharper and sharper focus on the "self." Solid Catholic teaching returns our focus away from ourselves to Father, Son and Holy Spirit. The original sin, Eve denied her womanhood when she desired to be like "gods." Since the only god she knew was the Father. Where was Adam? He stood impotent... in other words, they were divorced. There's a young girl at Robin's son's high school who was just told that she is the center of the universe and it's a tragic disservice to her.
Ditto what Mary said! A lot of high schools have very poor math and science depts, for boys and girls. I also am educated as a chemical engineer, but chose to teach the two years before we had children because its hours were more suited to spending time with children. (I was looking ahead). When it came time and I was pregnant with our first, I realized that I did not want to leave him with someone else, and was able to stay home full time. I am not sure it would have been that easy if we were used to another engineering income and not just a private school teacher income. Also some of my first job offers were out on oil rigs - I had no interest in that at all even though I enjoyed my engineering classes and did well in them. No one discouraged me from an engineering job, on the contrary I got a lot of flack for my decision not to pursue an engineering career.
I've been lurking, but this is one that irritates me. Beats the heck out of me what these "barriers" are. I was educated as a chemical engineer, where 1/3 of our class was women. However, in electrical engineering, only 1 or 2 out of 30 were women. Is it possible that women are Just Not Interested in some areas? Nah, it must be The Man keeping us down so we must legislate (and, I agree -- when they say "legistlate", I hear "quota"). And actually, I have a friend that was also a chemical engineer. When she lost her job, she decided not to go back into engineering and started working from home so she could spend more time with her 3 kids. Also, if nothing else, there are all kinds of incentives for women to enter science and engineering -- scholarships not available to men, guaranteed housing on campuses that do not guarantee housing to the general population, etc. I think you hit the nail on the head when you said that schools in general are not preparing students for the hard sciences. It is truly a sad state of affairs, the lack of science education these days.